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Dr. Eichin Chang-Lim is the author of the “Talking About Adolescence” series. She is passionate about promoting mental health awareness and helping teens live happy and fulfilling lives. For more, visit https://eichinchanglim.com/.
Dear 17-year-old Eichin,
I know you’re going through a lot right now. Growing up in a strict household can feel overwhelming and isolating. You may feel like no one is listening to you or understanding your emotions. But I want you to know that your feelings are valid, and your experiences shape you into a resilient and compassionate person.
Life at home can be tough, especially with the high expectations and strict rules. It’s okay to feel frustrated and even resentful. Remember, it’s not a reflection of your worth. You are strong, capable, and deserving of love and respect.
There will be moments when you feel like giving up, but I urge you to hold on. Writing in your diary is a powerful way to express your thoughts and emotions. Keep doing that—it’s your safe space. As you move forward, you’ll find that focusing on your studies and setting goals for yourself will open doors to new opportunities and freedom.
Two more years in high school, and you’ll start to see a brighter future. I see you’re working hard and aiming to get into a reputable university so you can move away from home. That sense of freedom you crave is within reach. You’ll find yourself in a new environment where you can grow and explore your passions. Don’t give up, even if you got a lower grade in math class last semester. Take a deep breath and know that you’re capable of incredible things. Don’t be afraid to dream big, explore your passions, and step outside your comfort zone. Remember, failures are growth opportunities, and setbacks are stepping stones to success.
It’s important to remember that your parents, despite their strict ways, love you deeply. Their methods may not always make sense to you, and that’s okay. As you grow older, you’ll understand they were doing their best with what they knew. Forgiveness will come in time, and it’s a gift you give yourself.
You’ll face many challenges, but each one will teach you something valuable. You’ll learn to balance structure with empathy and become a parent who listens and understands. Your journey will inspire others, and your story will help many who are going through similar struggles.
Never forget that it’s okay to seek help when sadness lingers and you feel empty, lonely, and hopeless. Therapy can be a lifeline; admitting you need support is a sign of strength, not weakness. You’ll find that talking through your experiences with a professional can bring clarity and healing.
Lastly, always be kind to yourself. Everyone makes mistakes, but every step is a step toward becoming your best self.
Embrace your journey with an open heart and a courageous spirit.
With all my love and prayers for you,
Your Future Self,
Eichin Chang-Lim
Dr. Eichin Chang-Lim holds a master of arts in psychology, a doctorate in optometry, and a master of science in microbiology. She is a multi-award-winning author of romantic fiction, short stories, memoirs, and self-help books. Her works explore the intricacies of human relationships and the human spirit’s resilience, evolving into inspirational tales that are both multidimensional and thought-provoking. Her books have won numerous awards, including the Writer’s Digest Self-Published Book Award (first place), the IndieReader Discovery Award (winner), the Readers’ Favorite Book Award (gold medal winner), the BIBA™ Literary Award (winners), etc.
Chang-Lim is passionate about using her writing to make a difference in people’s lives. “Every human being is valuable; every soul is unique and special,” she says. “I write with my heart and soul. My mindset is that if my writing can make a difference in even one person’s life, it’s all worth it, and that’s what love is all about.”
Chang-Lim lives in Orange County, California, with her husband and their poodle mix, Gabby.
For more information about Chang-Lim and her work, visit https://eichinchanglim.com.
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