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Survivor's Guilt & Suicide

Editor's note: It's important to preface today's post with a content warning for suicide. This column, which deals both with suicide and survivor's guilt, might not be one you're ready to read right now. That's OK.

If you're feeling suicidal, we've got two resources that have helped other teens and might help you too. They're both completely free and are available 24 hours a day. If you prefer to talk on the phone, call the Lifeline at 1.800.273.8255. And if you prefer to text, text the Crisis Text Line by sending the word HOME to 741-741.

And, a final note, we here at Story Time Teen are strong believers in the power of therapy. We know that this isn't a realistic option for every teenager, since some of you might not have the parental support or extra income necessary to make this happen. To be honest, that's a big reason why we decided to run this column. However, if you're one of the teens for whom therapy is an option, please consider it. Many of the adults you respect most have benefited from therapy, and it's likely that you will too. There's no shame in getting support, whether from a school counselor, a therapist, your parents, or another trusted adult in your life. And if you don't know how to bring it up, here's a post that might help.

There's a beautiful life on the other end of this. You deserve the chance to see it.


In my 8th grade year, I dated a girl that I really loved. A month after we broke up, she committed suicide. I feel like it's my fault. Am I right?

- 18 year old male

No. Absolutely not! Someone who commits suicide does it because of the emotional pain they are in and they can’t see a way out of it. It’s not your fault she committed suicide. For whatever reason she wasn’t able to cope anymore and so thought the only way out was through suicide. I believe suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary situation. It does get better with time and I wish she had reached out to people in her life to help her but sometimes the emotional pain is too great to see past it.

It’s not your fault. Keep repeating those words until you believe them.

The best gift you can give her is for you to move forward and live your life as you had hoped she would’ve been able to do.

I’m sorry for your loss.


About The Author: Kathleen S. Allen has a Master’s in Children’s Literature with an emphasis in creative writing for young adults. She was a theater major as an undergraduate and participated in many productions as an actor both in college and in community theater and a summer repertory company. 


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